SmartShanghai | [AskMats]: V-Day Ideas For Guys

[AskMats]: V-Day Ideas For Guys

By Matsume Kai, Feb 10th, 2009 | In AskMats

Ladies, before we start going off on how guys are morons when it comes to Valentine's Day, I need to mention a few things and I want you to keep them in mind. Valentines Day is a hard day... especially for guys.

For a lot of men, Valentine's Day can be a very stressful day. A lot of guys feel undue pressure, as if they are being judged on how well they perform (hmm, seems similar to another aspect of male-female interaction). Our expectations of Hollywood-style grandiose romance leave us feeling disappointed when our man fails to live up to the hype (and movies we see). This Valentine's Day, appreciate everything and anything your guy gives or does for you, and have no expectations whatsoever, lest you be disappointed.

Or better yet, do it the Japanese way! Ladies try to organize something for your man! (See part two of this article coming shortly.)

Here's one of my male friends on a Valentine's Day that went disastrous due to mismatched expectations: "I had flowers, a great restaurant, the works. At the end of the night, I pulled out my gift for her, a bracelet, and she burst into tears. She was apparently expecting an engagement ring. We broke up a few months later. Every time she looked at me I could see her disappointment, and it just became too much..."

So you get my point. Ladies, don't expect the world and ruin what is supposed to be a nice romantic night.

OK, boys. All that said, you're still expected to do a little extra for your partner and be thoughtful. No, do not buy her weight loss pills, PMS pills, hair removal wax, any kitchen ware, or a pregnancy test. It doesn't come down to how much money you spent, but how much thought you put into it. Here's list of cool things she may like:

1. A scavenger hunt!

I love this idea! My bf sent me on a hunt on my first birthday with him. On the day, he gave me an envelope that had a photo of Coco, on the back it read, "Go see this guy, he has something for you", so I went to go see him and then Coco gave me another envelope but this time containing a photo of my friend Calvin's shop. I rushed over in a taxi, my heart racing with excitement. When I got there, Calvin told me that there was another envelope hidden in his shop that would lead me to the final destination. Took me an hour before I could find it! The third envelope contained yet another photo of a place I went to when we first stated dating. It read, "find the spot where I first kissed you and dig." (This is starting to get a bit cheesy, but ahh f#*k it -- it's Valentine's Day).

So I went and found the spot and started digging. It was dark by the time I found it and I was covered in dirt but I didn't care. There was my gift, hidden and buried in a field, in Shanghai. Best day ever!

2. Rent a hotel room!

They're dirt cheap right now because of the economic crisis. Most places are half the regular price! Rent a room, but personalize it. Print photos of you two together or of her, frame 'em, and put em all over the room. She'll be able to take them home after and put them up in her room. Buy lots of candles! I'm sure you can call the hotel and ask them to go into the room before you arrive and light them for you! Plus women always look hot in candlelight! Buy a few disposable cameras, women love having their men take photos of them. Makes us feel sexy.

Oil! Can't forget the oil! Imagine what she would look like naked on your bed with oil all over her body in the candle light... anybody getting horny?

Think I need to change my undies now. And, of course, champagne or kava if you're looking for something cheaper. Maybe some of her favorite snacks. Chocolate? A bag of pistachios? Her favorites. Her favorite movies or movies you think she likes (yes, romantic ones) for after. And last but not least a mini gift (or a few to hide). Now this can be anything because by the time you give this to her, she'll already be in gah gah land about you, so don't worry too much about what it should be. Be prepared for a good shellacking!

3. Be her slave for a day!

Before you close your laptop, hear me out. This will benefit you as much as it will benefit her. Us ladies -- we like to feel powerful and in charge.

Of course, make some ground rules (like no manual labor or something), but let her be dominating for the day. Whatever she wants. No complaining. Call her master (if you guys are into that sort of thing).

You let her do this for a day -- imagine how riled up and horny she'll be by the evening. Power makes us feel sexy. I promise! And she'll make you do sexual favors for her -- favors you would have never imagined she would ask.

4. Cook her favorite meal.

But naked. You think guys are the only ones who love to watch their partners cook in the kitchen naked with an apron on? Come on! Wake up! Hey! It might start off funny and giggly but she'll love watching you shake your ass as you search for the butter in the fridge. (Or for the boys, he'll love watching you stick the turkey in the oven.) Let her/ him sit back with a glass of wine in the kitchen. Let her/him taste what you're cooking once in a while. You'll have a great time and most likely you'll end up clearing the table before you even finish dinner!

5. Surprise jewelery upgrade.

Does she have that favorite necklace or bag or key chain she always uses? Take it to a shop that will change that cheap H&M necklace into something real, like gold (duh) that she can hold onto forever or that maybe she can pass down to her kids (note, I said her kids, not yours, stop freaking out). Even the pleather bag that's falling apart! Take it to a leather shop and ask them to copy it. The fact that you knew it was her favorite and that you just made it so it could last longer is a bonus!

Maybe your backdoor thoughtfulness will cause her to be thoughtful with hers...

6. Last but not least.

It's cheesy. But us ladies love cheese: relive the first date. Take her to the place where you guys had your first date. Talk about or bring things that you had that day. The beginning of a relationship is always the sweetest and sexiest.

Man, did we ever f*@k like bunnies. Bunnies on ice!

***

So that's it for the gents! Ladies, you don't get a free pass. Part two of this article with ideas for ladies to treat their men on Valentine's Day coming soon.

P.S. A Little masturbatory self-promotion never hurts. You can also come to my salon Beijing Hair (I am hairstylist, doncha know) to pick up a nice gift certificate for a manicure, pedicure, or a waxing card. Or if she comes in all throughout February for a cut, she can have a free manicure as well.

[Ed's note]: Click here for Valentine's Day listings -- dinners, parties, and more. Hot damn.

Tagged: Expat Life Activities