Fast Food Abuse

by Christopher St Cavish
in Dining

There's something wrong going on in the new Channel One mall that's sprung up on the corner of Changshou Lu and Shaanxi Bei Lu. The mall came to be, one recent evening, in a miraculous instance of immaculate consumption. Tuesday, a forlorn corner. Tuesday night, a lightning bolt, three wise men in hardhats, and a Zara in a manger. By Wednesday, the remaining electrical charge in the air gave birth to two foodcourt mutants: StarDog and Mr. Waffle. They have eaten the fruit of the tree of Forbidden Fusion.

StarDog makes the bold claim to be "Shanghai's only serious Asian-style hot dog company ... here to save your tastebuds." They have taken the poor, unwashed hot dog masses and transformed them into spiral-cut "hot dogs" like The Teriyaki Tempation (Teriyaki Sauce, Mayo, Fried Onions, and Seaweed Strips) and The Fish Element (Spicy Japanese Fish Roe Sauce, Seaweed Strips, Bonito Flakes). There is, quite seriously, a proselytizing human-sized hot dog passing out flyers that say "Sayona Hamburger" in front of the store. I ordered a classic hot dog about two hours ago from her/it/the hot dog, the kind that makes me feel safe, with ketchup, mustard, onions, relish, and cheese sauce. Upon seeing the spiral of pale white flesh pulled out of its holding tank, I quickly reconsidered and passed it along to a colleague, who examined it excitedly before pronouncing it "not that good." A hot dog set, with a drink and fries, is under 30rmb, but that's not including the ongoing cost of rescuing your soul.

It'd be a just a minor sin among an otherwise rather nice food court (Noodle Bull, Burger King, a new and decent Viet fast-food joint called Pho Yummy), if not for what's just a few hot dog lengths away: Mr. Waffle. Why is it that in Bangkok, waffles have become not just a breakfast food, but a refined, delicious, ubiquitious street food, given their full due, but on Changshou Lu, they're turned into -- gasp -- sandwiches? The business card scared me off, with its picture of a rather delicious-looking sandwich of pepperjack cheese, tomatoes, lettuce, and Italian coldcuts, wrapped in a waffle.

How dare they. Someone call Pastor McDonald.
 

Crumpets

Jun 26, 09 - 12:40

Ahhh! I'd been wondering what would end up in that mall, and when it would open. Thanks for checking it out and reporting back to us, your adoring public ;)

slx

Jun 26, 09 - 19:23

yup...the long awaited Channel 1 is finally opened. Forget about the gorilla sized ad campaign of some eurasian dude with a tampon up one of its nostrils(i didn't get it, does it mean "Channel One's programming is so intense..its makes you bleed!" Or the monster sized led screen during their reno's that had some really bad animation on 24hr rotation. (at least it helped illuminate the senior dance nights at the park across the street) Despite the typical nightmarish marketing decisions the mall is actually quite decent. Lets shift our focus on the food courts though. The strategy of the maze-like weave to the 6th floor so all occupants can walk pass all the branded shops is well...confusing. Try to hit one of the hidden elevators on the side of the lobby to avoid having to walk into Jack Jones. (which will end up with a savard spinarama out the front anyways) Once at the top you gots your staples like Burger King and DQ. For restuarants i would suggest Pu Jin ( Macau Food ), Noodle Bull. The viet place "Pho Yummy" was actually surprisingly yummy. They even got matching nike kicks for the waitresses which was surprising for newer brand that paid close attention to detail. The hot dog place looked sketchy and overpriced. Juice connection at the end of the strip also looked like a rip off to Jugo. All is all the experience wasn't that bad especially for someone who lives in that area. The closest thing to a mall is probaly Jing An Temple or People's Square so i can't complain. later y'all

xakiat1

Jun 27, 09 - 20:27

Not so sure if I agree with the editor about StarDog. StarDog is actually based on a very successful model in Vancouver, Canada. See it at www.japadog.com. The Japanese-style fusion hotdogs are so hot they have celebrities like Ice Cube coming back for more. It was also positively reviewed by Anthony Bordain and featured on his programme (Anthony is Amerian, I recall). I'm a big fan of StarDog, and StarDog has also received very good reviews on local Chinese websites: http://www.dianping.com/shop/3136816 Their Teriyaki Temptation and Fish Element hot dogs are very good. Well innovation isn't always so well taken in by the conventional. PS: As for Mr Waffle, well, yes, I do agree turning a waffle into a sandwich is a bit more of a stretch...

rob.r

Jun 27, 09 - 21:29

While I still have to try Stardog and will reserve further judgment until I do, it's important to point out that to say one is based on Japadog does not make one the equal of Japadog.

Didjelirium

Jun 29, 09 - 11:53

Well, no matter how good or bad this might be, i was looking forward for this shopping-mall food floor to open cos it's 5 min walk from my home, and finally i have a Subway accessible and close enough for them to deliver....as well as the royal family of the burger which is still better than MacWaltDisney.... So yeah, it's kind of a good thing though. Still, the waffle sandwiches scared me too, the hot dogs are not that good but damn, Saizeriya is there too and that is cheap not-that-good food that you eat anyway cos man ! 9 kuai for spaghetti bolognese, even the xinjiang guys are more expensive !!!! Anyway, fast food abuse or not, sometimes after a street food abuse it's nice to have it too ! Bless !

Didjelirium

Jun 29, 09 - 11:55

AS for the gigantic led screen flashing til your epileptic, i so wish i knew how to hack it and plug my Wii on it.... Then we could organize Mario Kart contest from the park just down, and that would simply be awefuckinsome !!!! :)

xakiat1

Jun 29, 09 - 16:26

While it's important to to point out that One Based on Japadog Does Not Make One the Equal of Japadog, there isn't a Japadog in a 3,000 mile radius, so I'm afraid that makes it the best there is. We're not in Canuck-land here.

AdamIF

Jun 29, 09 - 17:44

Really, people, I think we should all give StarDog a chance. While the standards may not be what some of us lofty individuals might expect, StarDog is doing its darndest to give all of us in Shanghai the real taste of the hot dog ¨C albeit with a bit of a fusion twist that's found a sweet spot with the locals. I was over Channel One over the weekend to try StarDog, and to my surprise, it's actually quite good, VERY yummy. The Teriyaki Temptation is tasty, with its teriyaki sauce and Nori. The sauces are all imported Japanese stuff - the real thing. The counter staff told me they're in the process of replacing their cheese sauce formula (and they're out of curly fries for the time being ¨C said whole of Shanghai's out of stock). While some of us may think 'it's not that good', actually it's 'not that bad either'. I can't find a better one elsewhere for that price ¨C and i think StarDog's packaging rocks! As for the waffle, yeh, it is creepy having meat on your waffle (that sounds wrong doesn't it).
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