As every knows, Tex-Mex food -- which was invented in California in the late '80s and perfected in Paris, hey, just kidding, not really -- is either cheap and terrible or great and expensive. Those are the two options: cheap and fuggin' terrible or great and fuggin' expensive. At least in China anyway, I've found. Presumably in Arizona, Utah, south Texas, northern Mexico, California, and Paris they've got all sorts of Tex-Mex restaurants that are all over the spectrum. I dunno. Probably should have consulted the SmBj staff member who is actually from San Antonio, but he wasn't around. He's got "band practice" and a SERIOUS "Peter Pan complex". Here's what Fiesta Tex-Mex looks like, currently soft open as of last Saturday: It's a big place with a Mexican saloon kind of feel. Road signs and old timey pix of Mehico on the wall. It's pretty alright actually. It's not completely overdone, it's comfortable enough, and it ticks all the boxes to culturally signify a dusty southern USA, Mexico-wave restaurant. Kind of feels like one of those nice but not super nice chain restaurants you go to have dinner with your parents before going to a movie because they're both in the same strip mall. I always get my mum to pick me up some socks and undies from the Old Navy in the same strip mall before dinner because it's real convenient. HATS. FOOD. So I couldn't take a picture of the menu because they're doing that iPad ordering thing. Which is alright, I guess, because we're in 2015, but I'm going to miss those giant kitschy menus at places like this, with like lasso font and six-shooters as bullet points for the different sections. Kind of feel like we're losing something precious if we lose those. So there's not too much on offer because I guess they're still gearing up, but you're looking at the following sections: Botanas, Soups, Salads, Fresh Flour Tortillas, "From the Grill", Extras, Hot Sizzling Plates, Slow Roasted, and Deserts. With 2-5 or so in each section. Ensalada Caramon - 64rmb Yep, alright. Nice and fresh. Lovely mangoes, avocado, and shrimp bros. Pretty alright. Ehhh, a little small on the portion for 64rmb though. Sopa de tortilla -26rmb Real good. Lovely broth and a pretty complex thing going on with the ingredients. The tortilla crunch against the meat was real great. Thumbs up here. Burrito Carne - 98rmb It's a 100rmb burrito. I know it's the steak one -- the most expensive one -- but it's a 100rmb burrito that came with no sides or anything. That's kind of a bummer. But it did the job though. It pretty alright. Came with some truly excellent guac and some decent salsa. The tortilla was great as well. Homemade. Blasted this bastard in like 2 seconds. I like that it's not overly complex or filled out with a bunch of rice. (See: cheap and fuggin' terrible Tex-Mex restaurants.) Grill Camarones - 86rmb Re-upped on another main, "from the grill". This was a pretty involved thing. A sizzler plate with tortillas on the side, salsa, and sour cream. You DIY this one. Pretty good. DRINKS. Beer comes for the Hacker-Pschorr next door, but it's been renamed "Fiesta Lager" instead of "Sprockets Lager" or whatever it is over there. Beer's straightforward and good. No real cocktails menu yet. The "Bar" section of the name refers to a room adjacent from the dining hall, which is the same wood theme with a DJ booth, stripper pole (yes), and pictures of Michael Jackson, Fleetwood Mac, and Nirvana on the walls. Looks like you could have a nightmare good time in there. It looks like a hammered Austrian's heaven. The Take-Away: Pretty surprising, actually. Given the sign out front (see below), with the neon bull and all, I was thinking I'd be in for chilli stains on shirts, cheddar cheese flying around, CCR on the stereo, mechanical bull rides, and gigantic, gust-busting Texas portions on food. It's not really like that at all. Food tilts towards the higher end of the spectrum in terms of quality and price. This place is owned by the same dude or dudes as Hacker-Pschorr next door, and feels geared towards that restaurants intended audience: big tables of businessmen out for a little cultural tourism who can afford to splash out. Food's pretty decent, but I get the feeling born-and-bred Texans would be a little... ehhhh. They take that stuff pretty serious... *** Fiesta Tex-Mex Bar & Grill is at 12 Xindong Lu, right next to Hacker-Pschorr, across from the Lambo dealership, just below street level. They're open daily from 11:30am.